Thursday, August 28, 2008
Longest week ever
I have never looked forward to Friday so much in my life. Every day this week so far has been like pulling teeth. I move my bedroom stuff from my mom's tomorrow and the rest on friday. I won't have to sleep at a strange house after a hard night at the bar, and I can't wait. See ya there!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Why my mom sucks
My mom has been promising things for years and then backing out. It's sort of her M.O. Believe it or not my dad has the same bad habit. It's made me into a real 'waiting for the other shoe to drop' kind of girl. So it should be no surprise to me that she did it again.
I will not be the next owner of a 1992 Lexus es-300. Something about new alternator, $2300, and faulty electrical system. That's all fine, no problem, I understand, right? Except that with my mom I never know if she's making shit up. Whatever, I probably won't be driving that much in my new place, anyway.
I will not be the next owner of a 1992 Lexus es-300. Something about new alternator, $2300, and faulty electrical system. That's all fine, no problem, I understand, right? Except that with my mom I never know if she's making shit up. Whatever, I probably won't be driving that much in my new place, anyway.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
melancholy
I am concerned about my mental state. I don't think I'm headed for a straight jacket or anything like that, I just don't like my attitude. First of all, have you noticed how long it's been since my last science blog? The main thing that concerns me, though is that I'm no longer the happy go lucky single gal I was when I first became single again. The shiny has worn off the penny a bit, to say the least. My love life is a bit of a clusterfuck, of late. When I first got out of the relationship the world was full of possibilities and it seemed like everyone was dying to get a piece of me. I felt like a really hot commodity. That's not really what is bothering me either, though.
I have begun to begrudge my singleness. It's this thing I used to do before I got in the relationship, before I knew what it was all about and thought it was the thing that would make me happy. I would constantly, but subliminally, yearn for the day, hour, minute, when I would meet the man of my dreams and somehow it would make my life perfect. Logically I know this is ridiculous and I judge and ridicule women like that. However, it sits in the back of my brain. I hate it, and I'm doing it again. The only difference is I know a lot better what I want and will NOT get involved with someone who is not right for me just because I want to be in a relationship. I just wish it was all happy and fun and anything's possible again, cause right now I'm a bit hung up on this one dude that got away. Whatever, he'll be back. They ALWAYS come back.
I have begun to begrudge my singleness. It's this thing I used to do before I got in the relationship, before I knew what it was all about and thought it was the thing that would make me happy. I would constantly, but subliminally, yearn for the day, hour, minute, when I would meet the man of my dreams and somehow it would make my life perfect. Logically I know this is ridiculous and I judge and ridicule women like that. However, it sits in the back of my brain. I hate it, and I'm doing it again. The only difference is I know a lot better what I want and will NOT get involved with someone who is not right for me just because I want to be in a relationship. I just wish it was all happy and fun and anything's possible again, cause right now I'm a bit hung up on this one dude that got away. Whatever, he'll be back. They ALWAYS come back.
Monday, August 18, 2008
mom is trying to help me land a husband
It should be a secret, but I really like living with my mom. I think she's giving me the Lexus, so that should carry her well into the teens decade for buying my affection, but that's actually not why I like it. It has cramped my dating a bit because I can't bring some nice young boy home for dinner (or anything else), but a little forced virtue never hurt anyone.
The most entertaining development is that she's living a bit vicariously through me. She likes the party life, so she understands about my lifestyle. I've also lost a few pounds and she is REALLY excited about that. On my birthday she made me get my hair highlighted. Yesterday she saw me in a halter top and was so excited about how thin I looked she went out at bought me another tube top the next day. Now she has promised to buy me one in every color.
One advantage of the halter is is properly showcased my my snake moments last night. My killer sunburn has developed into gnarly blisters and then huge chunks of peeling skin. People found it entertaining to peel me at the bar last night.
Another advantage was that I got hit on more in one night than I have in a month. It was a great night. Still no husband, though. Just kidding, I don't think I ever want to get married. I like the idea of life long monogomy, but I've worked way too many weddings in my life to be too jazzed about the idea. I once worked a wedding at the Oregon Trail center downtown, where the salads were served in Martini Glasses. I think someone told me the whole thing cost $40,000. That's a down payment on a house. That's a Yacht. Fuck that. That's why I tell every guy that gets halfway serious about me that I will only get married in Vegas, by an Elvis. I am so serious.
The most entertaining development is that she's living a bit vicariously through me. She likes the party life, so she understands about my lifestyle. I've also lost a few pounds and she is REALLY excited about that. On my birthday she made me get my hair highlighted. Yesterday she saw me in a halter top and was so excited about how thin I looked she went out at bought me another tube top the next day. Now she has promised to buy me one in every color.
One advantage of the halter is is properly showcased my my snake moments last night. My killer sunburn has developed into gnarly blisters and then huge chunks of peeling skin. People found it entertaining to peel me at the bar last night.
Another advantage was that I got hit on more in one night than I have in a month. It was a great night. Still no husband, though. Just kidding, I don't think I ever want to get married. I like the idea of life long monogomy, but I've worked way too many weddings in my life to be too jazzed about the idea. I once worked a wedding at the Oregon Trail center downtown, where the salads were served in Martini Glasses. I think someone told me the whole thing cost $40,000. That's a down payment on a house. That's a Yacht. Fuck that. That's why I tell every guy that gets halfway serious about me that I will only get married in Vegas, by an Elvis. I am so serious.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Red in the face
Amber the lobster at your service. I went to Santa Cruz yesterday, which is always a good thing. Unfortunately I know someone who is able to make it bad: my ex-boyfriend Mike. I made the mistake of answering his call while I was walking to the beach from the boardwalk, and by the end of our conversation he managed to make me cry. I seem to be crying more than usual lately, which may not be my fault, but rather the fault of ortho-tri cyclen lo. Said cause is being given the boot due to other inconveniences it is involved in. Anyway, he still managed to make me cry. I'm not sure he ever got me to cry while we were together. This was not a nostalgic, weep for what might have been crying. This was mean and hurtful comment crying. So anyway, when he tried to call me back for about the fifth time in this argument I told him I never wanted to talk to him again as long as I lived and turned off my phone. I think I mean it, too. Bastard. One of the other side effects of the conversation was my distraction while I was getting sunburned. So now I am a stinging color of red on my face, shoulders, arms, chest, and stomach. I could feel it in my sleep. I am hoping it will fade by this weekend, and I am actually not unrealistic in this hope. If you have seen my legs lately you know that they are ghostly. I also enjoy the vitamin-d rush of sunbathing. I am not averse to a mild sunburn and rarely use sun block. Do I have a death wish, you may ask? No, of course not. For one I go out in the sun in this fashion maybe once a year, and rarely burn this bad. Also, though I am pale, I also have a strange combination of nationalities in me including native american. This causes my occasional sunburn to fade very quickly and have very little side-effects. After the sun burn the rays have little effect on me and it can take a month for me to develop any sort of deep tan. This almost never happens. So thanks to Mike (fucker) for the tan.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Road Trip- in progress
8 hours in a car without air conditioning, sweaty as hell, in a rush to get a cheap hotel. Apparently $90 is too much to pay, so we settle for a $75 one which looks alright from the outside. It is not. I will later post pictures, but right now you'll have to trust me. It has a kitchenette, but the stove is not plugged in, the table has only one chair, and several of the cabinets are missing their doors. And that's just the kitchenette. In the main area the dresser is missing a drawer, there are two diferent curtains on the windows, and there is no AC in San Jose, CA. In the bathroom, there was no toilet paper and a toothless man knocks on the door soon after check in with a shower head in his hand, as there isn't one. The walls are covered in plaster and the water is pink. The neighbors are crackheads and there are broken appliances outside. The only bright spot: San Jose has free public wi-fi so I am able to be online right now. This part of the trip wasn't really for me anyway. I used to live here, but Carla (the bride) grew up here, and I brought them their car so they could get back on time without having to pay $500 to change plane tickets. I'm just along for the ride. Their family is out visiting with her friends and I wasn't really up to it. I thought this as good a time as any to blog. I am seriously scared by this room, and I'm not easily spooked. This trip has given me ample opportunity to forget about my problems and, alternatively, time to dwell on them. Driving through the desert for 19 hours alone will force you into self reflection. I know that in the grand scale my problems are minor, but they feel big. But enough about that, let's talk about vegas.
I have decided to look at this as a learning trip. I could have had a better time had I been a bit more experienced with this town, and I learned alot about what to do and what not to do. Don't get me wrong, I've had a blast, but I made alot of mistakes. The first day here was the best. I woke up at around 12 after crashing immediately upon arrival at around 5:30. I went down to a cafe and spent $7 for a sandwich and soup, and soda. It wasn't awful, but I warn all who hope to visit here that vegas food gives you the shits. Then to the pool. It was hot, as I'm told Vegas is this time of year. It was crowded too. Not just the pool, the whole f'ing town was packed. The bridal mafia was in full effect, something about the 8/8/08 thing being a big wedding day. Also, there was a fraternity convention in town (awesome). Next I headed to the mall to get my haircut before the wedding later that night. No go as the cheapest place in the mall wanted $50, and my hair cut ain't difficult enough to be worth that. So I went back and started to get ready. The ceremony was in a cute little outdoor area of the Viva Las Vegas wedding chapel. It was short and to the point, and I will never forget the look on Carla's face during the ceremony. It's hard to explain; it was partly nervousness, and Rich said her hands were shaking, but it was also something else that I can't really describe. Everyone looked beautiful and it was perfect. Then it was off to the
Stratosphere for the reception. I gambled a little before the reception as we had some time to kill. I lost $25 on $5 blackjack but made up some of it with my free beer. I didn't lose it immediately, I won a few hands, and should have stuck with table games for the rest of my trip. Then dinner, which was quite good. A few people gave toasts, and of course I couldn't resist, mostly because it was so loud in there I knew I was the only one who would be heard.
"Carla, now you can't try to sell him anymore; Rich, there are no words. You're short-bus special, baby and we love you. "
Eloquent, I know.
Everyone's feet hurt unbelievably bad and mine were no exception. We head back to the hotel to change our clothes and prepare for some heavy duty partying. Everyone else partied the night before and so I was a bit more anxious than them. I'm not exactly sure what happened next. What I do know is that in our hotel there were no $5 blackjack tables and I certainly wasn't prepared for $15 a hand. So I went to the electronic games. First of all, the video poker machines don't recommend which cards to hold like they do back home. I don't know how many wins I missed because I forgot that. Not just when I forgot altogether, but when I forgot to count straights. Anyway, in not much time I had lost $120. I just had a bad feeling at that point and decided that that would be my entire gambling budget. A good thing, because after I drank and whatnot, I had $100 left. I just wasn't prepared for how expensive everything was. For example, a 6 inch sub meal at subway was $9.15. I can not tell you how many times I have heard 'why didn't you get a five dollar foot long?' The best part of the night was the clubbing. We didn't bother with 'Rain' or anything like that, either you have to get in really early or the cover is really high and the line really long. We went to a club in the lobby of our hotel (the Imperial Palace, on the strip). It was actually really cool. One of the members of our party paid for VIP, so we had our own section with free booze. Awesome. Plus, they played better music in the first 10 minutes than I heard the entire time I was at a club last time in Portland. And once you've had VIP, it's hard not to be spoiled. The bars don't close in Vegas, so we GOT IT ON. We danced our asses off. Some memorable moments were 'Face down, Ass up' by 2 live crew and the Pony song, I don't know who thats by (if you're horny, let's do it, ride it, my pony. My saddle's waiting, come and jump on it) There was lots of air lassooing and mimed ass slapping. We then decided not to pay $265 for another bottle of booze, as the same bottle was $25 in the lobby store. We bought one and headed to the room. I'm actually amazed how long we made it before security was called. Highlights of that were playing 'I never' (of course I was put on blast, as usual) and the passing of the cigaweed. Others played spades, but I am not familiar with that game. We eventually headed to breakfast. I got distracted by the shiny flashing lights and sat down to play a little. I end up chatting with an English bloke here for some IT conference. Leave it to me to find another computer nerd. By this time it is approaching 6 am and I am loaded. I would like to take a second and appreciate the fact that I am blasted out of my gourd and it's okay, in fact it's encouraged. The English bloke and his friend buy me another beer, we gamble some more, and I am off to bed. I wake at 3 the next day and go walk the pallazo at Caesar's Palace: the one with the famous ceiling. I was a bit disheartened at this point because I realize that this uber-mall thing is a lot of what there is to do here, and something I am entirely not interested in. It's still exciting to look at. Next came my $9 sub in the middle of the casino next door to ours called 'O'shea's. This casino is far superior to ours in many ways, and it's clear that my time the night before was entirely wasted. First, the barker is a midget, dressed like a leprechaun. Awesome. They have 24 hour happy hour with $2 drinks, and there table minimums are $5 or less. There is also beer pong. The best part, though, is this casino has War. You gamble on the old lame as child's game. I later find out that even the Bellagio, of Ocean's Eleven fame, has war. The imperial palace did not. I find that it is depressing in Vegas with little or no money, so I go take a nap. We end the night walking the strip. For some stupid reason I decided not to drink that night. We see Harrahs, the MGM Grand, the Bellagio, NY NY, Treasure Island, the Luxor, and more I can't remember. The people watching is awesome, there is an obese wheelchair-madame, panhandlers, and people hawking hookers wearing sandwich boards. Back to the hotel for a 3 am breakfast and then off to sleep. Sunday we go spend the day at Rich's cousins house up in the desert. The pool in their apartment has a waterfall, and the view is AMAZING. We leave Las Vegas in the Expedition, my chariot from the trip up.
It has a 24 gallon tank and is advertised to get 18 mpg highway. This works out to about 432 miles on a tank. There must have been a 'last gas for 97 miles' sign, but towards the end of my second tank of gas I missed it. I am white knuckled in the middle of the Nevada desert praying for a gas station. At 512 miles on the odometer I pull into Ely, Nevada, proclaiming a gasoline miracle.
Anyway, now we are on our way out and it is HOT. I still sleep for 7 or so hours. We pull into San Jose and start looking for a motel.
Fast forward to now, when I am watching fuzzy tv and writing this blog. We are headed to Santa Cruz tomorrow, which should be fun, then we will head home at about midnight tomorow night. I cannot wait to get home. Honestly I was over it yesterday. I wish I had flown.
I have decided to look at this as a learning trip. I could have had a better time had I been a bit more experienced with this town, and I learned alot about what to do and what not to do. Don't get me wrong, I've had a blast, but I made alot of mistakes. The first day here was the best. I woke up at around 12 after crashing immediately upon arrival at around 5:30. I went down to a cafe and spent $7 for a sandwich and soup, and soda. It wasn't awful, but I warn all who hope to visit here that vegas food gives you the shits. Then to the pool. It was hot, as I'm told Vegas is this time of year. It was crowded too. Not just the pool, the whole f'ing town was packed. The bridal mafia was in full effect, something about the 8/8/08 thing being a big wedding day. Also, there was a fraternity convention in town (awesome). Next I headed to the mall to get my haircut before the wedding later that night. No go as the cheapest place in the mall wanted $50, and my hair cut ain't difficult enough to be worth that. So I went back and started to get ready. The ceremony was in a cute little outdoor area of the Viva Las Vegas wedding chapel. It was short and to the point, and I will never forget the look on Carla's face during the ceremony. It's hard to explain; it was partly nervousness, and Rich said her hands were shaking, but it was also something else that I can't really describe. Everyone looked beautiful and it was perfect. Then it was off to the
Stratosphere for the reception. I gambled a little before the reception as we had some time to kill. I lost $25 on $5 blackjack but made up some of it with my free beer. I didn't lose it immediately, I won a few hands, and should have stuck with table games for the rest of my trip. Then dinner, which was quite good. A few people gave toasts, and of course I couldn't resist, mostly because it was so loud in there I knew I was the only one who would be heard.
"Carla, now you can't try to sell him anymore; Rich, there are no words. You're short-bus special, baby and we love you. "
Eloquent, I know.
Everyone's feet hurt unbelievably bad and mine were no exception. We head back to the hotel to change our clothes and prepare for some heavy duty partying. Everyone else partied the night before and so I was a bit more anxious than them. I'm not exactly sure what happened next. What I do know is that in our hotel there were no $5 blackjack tables and I certainly wasn't prepared for $15 a hand. So I went to the electronic games. First of all, the video poker machines don't recommend which cards to hold like they do back home. I don't know how many wins I missed because I forgot that. Not just when I forgot altogether, but when I forgot to count straights. Anyway, in not much time I had lost $120. I just had a bad feeling at that point and decided that that would be my entire gambling budget. A good thing, because after I drank and whatnot, I had $100 left. I just wasn't prepared for how expensive everything was. For example, a 6 inch sub meal at subway was $9.15. I can not tell you how many times I have heard 'why didn't you get a five dollar foot long?' The best part of the night was the clubbing. We didn't bother with 'Rain' or anything like that, either you have to get in really early or the cover is really high and the line really long. We went to a club in the lobby of our hotel (the Imperial Palace, on the strip). It was actually really cool. One of the members of our party paid for VIP, so we had our own section with free booze. Awesome. Plus, they played better music in the first 10 minutes than I heard the entire time I was at a club last time in Portland. And once you've had VIP, it's hard not to be spoiled. The bars don't close in Vegas, so we GOT IT ON. We danced our asses off. Some memorable moments were 'Face down, Ass up' by 2 live crew and the Pony song, I don't know who thats by (if you're horny, let's do it, ride it, my pony. My saddle's waiting, come and jump on it) There was lots of air lassooing and mimed ass slapping. We then decided not to pay $265 for another bottle of booze, as the same bottle was $25 in the lobby store. We bought one and headed to the room. I'm actually amazed how long we made it before security was called. Highlights of that were playing 'I never' (of course I was put on blast, as usual) and the passing of the cigaweed. Others played spades, but I am not familiar with that game. We eventually headed to breakfast. I got distracted by the shiny flashing lights and sat down to play a little. I end up chatting with an English bloke here for some IT conference. Leave it to me to find another computer nerd. By this time it is approaching 6 am and I am loaded. I would like to take a second and appreciate the fact that I am blasted out of my gourd and it's okay, in fact it's encouraged. The English bloke and his friend buy me another beer, we gamble some more, and I am off to bed. I wake at 3 the next day and go walk the pallazo at Caesar's Palace: the one with the famous ceiling. I was a bit disheartened at this point because I realize that this uber-mall thing is a lot of what there is to do here, and something I am entirely not interested in. It's still exciting to look at. Next came my $9 sub in the middle of the casino next door to ours called 'O'shea's. This casino is far superior to ours in many ways, and it's clear that my time the night before was entirely wasted. First, the barker is a midget, dressed like a leprechaun. Awesome. They have 24 hour happy hour with $2 drinks, and there table minimums are $5 or less. There is also beer pong. The best part, though, is this casino has War. You gamble on the old lame as child's game. I later find out that even the Bellagio, of Ocean's Eleven fame, has war. The imperial palace did not. I find that it is depressing in Vegas with little or no money, so I go take a nap. We end the night walking the strip. For some stupid reason I decided not to drink that night. We see Harrahs, the MGM Grand, the Bellagio, NY NY, Treasure Island, the Luxor, and more I can't remember. The people watching is awesome, there is an obese wheelchair-madame, panhandlers, and people hawking hookers wearing sandwich boards. Back to the hotel for a 3 am breakfast and then off to sleep. Sunday we go spend the day at Rich's cousins house up in the desert. The pool in their apartment has a waterfall, and the view is AMAZING. We leave Las Vegas in the Expedition, my chariot from the trip up.
It has a 24 gallon tank and is advertised to get 18 mpg highway. This works out to about 432 miles on a tank. There must have been a 'last gas for 97 miles' sign, but towards the end of my second tank of gas I missed it. I am white knuckled in the middle of the Nevada desert praying for a gas station. At 512 miles on the odometer I pull into Ely, Nevada, proclaiming a gasoline miracle.
Anyway, now we are on our way out and it is HOT. I still sleep for 7 or so hours. We pull into San Jose and start looking for a motel.
Fast forward to now, when I am watching fuzzy tv and writing this blog. We are headed to Santa Cruz tomorrow, which should be fun, then we will head home at about midnight tomorow night. I cannot wait to get home. Honestly I was over it yesterday. I wish I had flown.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Shoulda Known
The fact is I did know. I knew it was all bullshit. People make promises to me they can't keep all the time, probably that happens to everyone. I was completely prepared for it to be bullshit. But it was fun to think that it was me, for once. It's always someone else, ya know. It was nice to think that finally I was the girl. And I knew it was bullshit. But it was fun. I would say that next time I'll know better, but I probably won't. See yall when I get back from Vegas.
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