have you ever seen a bee with a sunburned knee?

haven't blogged in a while, i'm kinda out of practice. I think i'm in heavy heavy like. the who is a me to know, you to find out sort of situation. just know that i'm a little spun right now. (and it's not martin). speaking of that sitch, there are some interesting events to report; night after night of ....NOTHING. no sex. not even heavy petting. I must say i'm kinda surprised about that, but it definitely would have interfered with my heavy like. He actually turned me down! just once, and that was enough for me to not try again. in hindsight i'm glad. i was kind of doing it because the person i like was on my shit list and i was ready to put an end to my feelings, but now i feel that might have been hasty. I am obsessed with food. I'm sure i've said it before, but i really watch food network like it's mtv (think mtv like it used to be. you know, when it would show videos (cool ones) most of the time, with spurts of news every now and then, and everyone under the age of 30 would have it on in the background for hours at a time) well that's how i watch food network. I haven't decided who my favorite chefs are, though. I like sarah moulton alot, and giada delaurentis is so petite i just want to put her in my pocket. her presentation of italian dishes is quite mesmerising. i guess my favorite would have to be alton brown. I don't know that he's ever been a professional chef, as in a restaurant, but he has his own show called good eats. What makes his show so good is the way he focuses on one subject, say eggs for example and goes through all the myths and popular ways to handle it. He backs up all of his suggestions with explanations and science. My math classes are going alright. I had a nervous breakdown in vector class on weds. I got one of my homeworks back and i got 3/30 on it. The teacher grades homework randomly and two of the three problems he graded happened to be the ones i didn't do. I did poorly on the first homework and on the first midterm, so i was a bit worried. I was a little distraught so i went in the bathroom and balled for a minute. I was mostly upset because i wasn't getting the material. this is my major so that is my main concern. the grade is really just a means to me. it'll be alright, im sure. On a few lighter notes we're going to the river saturday. right now it's myself, martin, lynn, jackie, and maybe jessica. i haven't told them but i plan on packing a nice picnic, with cheeses, fruit and bread. i will also be making a fruit and juice concoction to mix with a bottle of cheap white wine. yeah!!!! did i mention i'm in like. anyway. schools almost out, but these last two weeks will be a little hectic. after that i need to do some workin!