Sick

I'm on my third day not getting out of bed. I'm tired of being sick and am getting up and joining the real world tomorrow whether I feel better or not. I will feel better, i feel pretty good now. I got sick on weds. I went out on Thanksgiving with my homegirl and a date. It was fun but I won't be seeing him again. She talked me into going out on Fri. as well. I knew I was going to get worse but I also knew I would have the weekend to get better. We went to see Neurosis at Dantes. They were wierd. Kinda like the dead combined with tool or something. I wasn't having a terrible time but Christine wasn't into it so we bailed and went to the hut. We met some dudes and drank beers with them a little and then after the bar closed. Then we went home. As predicted I was sicker the next day and decided I would stay in bed till I got well. Fast forward to today and that is finally the case. What is surprising to me is how stoked I was with just staying in bed. Usually when I stay home on a Saturday night for any reason I get ants in my pants and I can feel people partying without me. This time I was right where I wanted to be. I haven't showered since friday. EEEEW.

Sick

f someone knows the secret to not getting sick i wish you would let me in on it. i'm sick of getting sick. anyway. went out last night against my better judgement cause my friend was really jonesin. I owed her one for going out with me when she didn't want to. I only had, like, 4 beers in 4 hours. I think i might have had 1 cigarette. Actually 2. I think it was the claustrophobic smoke of the Sandy Hut that did it. And now I am too sick to function and my good friends' reception is tonight. I'm not gonna go. no choice. Still waiting to hear back from NYC. Keep your fingers crossed.

Down and out in Beverly Hills

an interesting movie, i'd say. I hadn't seen it since I was a kid, and watching it again, it makes more sense. I'm sick. Missed class today and i plan on laying in bed all day so i can get over it quickly. I was supposed to have a date tonight. Hopefully dude won't mind waiting till tomorrow. So I read Vogue. right now it's one of only two magazines I subscribe to. The impression that vogue is strictly materialistic and superficial is a deceptive one. I have actually read many a deep and thoughtful article in said magazine. Like the one I read this morning. A very gifted and lucky female war correspondent mused over the life and death of her hero and role model, a woman named Oriana Fallaci. She was an iconoclast (she referred to herself as La Fallaci) and had interviewed everyone from Indira Ghandi to Qaddafi. Not only did she interview them but she was bossy and probing in a way that no other reporter could pull off. This correspondent was writing not of her admiration for Fallaci (although that was implied), but how she avoided what she observed to be the one failing of Fallaci. Fallaci had only one love in her long and war torn career, a greek freedom fighter who was killed in a car crash. She also never had children, but wrote about her regret for the fact in a book "Letter to a Child Never Born". The author di Giovanni woke up one day and realized she feared ending up the same way. She took a leave of absence, married another journalist she had been flinging for years, and had a child within 9 months. I am frightened. I am frightened of ending up like either of these women. I can't say I am as career driven as either of them, or rather that my career is as impressive as either of theres (math teachers are not known for their fame). I really am fairly driven, actually. I am reflecting on this because of my recent sickness. I new it was coming, after all, it was only a matter of time what with the travelling and non stop school, studying, tutoring, and partying. Also, I am about to leave everything and everyone I love and pick up and move to NY for more school and more work. I don't forsee that as being my last move. Let's hope I don't end up old and alone with my high minded aspirations and integrity. Also, I don't want to drop everything and do it on purpose cause I'm afraid it won't happen otherwise. Ivory towers are pretty, but they're lonely. Still, it's where I live.

Geek Cusina

you know, i love my friends. They're like my family. which is why I sometimes venture to places like the geek cusina. My friends like it there, and i like rap music, so i go to make them happy. The dudes there are tools, though. So when the party started to wind down at the cusina I caught a cab towards sunnier parts; the sandy hut. Little did I know upon arrival at 12:45 that my night was just getting started. My two P.I.C. were already there and gotten things started. The dance party was in full swing, and we all commented on how much we liked it when dudes participated as well. Of course the girls are gonna dance, ya know. It was the huts greatest hits; sabbath, benetar, cheap trick, you know them by heart. There was even some male ass shaking when madonna came on. Some dude I had a date with, like, three years ago put stickers on my boobs. Then he asked me to go home with him (yeah right). It sucks cause I think he has a girlfriend, and I don't like dudes like that. Another dude was playing basketball with sugar packets and my cleavage. Honestly, it was only a 4 foot shot, but he didn't make one. Shaq. He finally curtailed his 5th grade antics and hit on me like an adult. We went and drank with the usual dirtbags, and shaq wanted me to hang out, but I don't need to the walk of shame in a house full of dirtbags. Even though it wouldn't have been a real walk of shame every one would think it was. I did give my tongue a bit of a work out though. He got my number. Problem is I'm a lame duck now. I mean, I'm moving to New York in as soon as 7 months, and i'm not interested in anything serious. I'm also not really into the casual thing right now. Oh well, I always find a way to get my action. Time to go do some chemistry homework.

too much beer

sometimes my mouth has a mind of it's own. oh well, it's just makin' out. Lynn, what is thay say about little packages?

nyc photos

two slideshows kiddies:

slideshow1

slideshow2

My Heart Belongs to Portland

for now... I am homesick after only 4 days in the big apple. I had a great time, but it's a bit lonely in the big city by yourself. The interview was yesterday and it went great. I was expecting more math people, so that bodes well for my chances. After the interview was over I was excited to get down to some serious partying. And party I did!. but i'm getting ahead of myself. Friday I went all over. I scoped out the interview place so I would know how to get there. It was on park ave. so I got to see what that neighborhood was all about. I also saw St. Andrews cathedral, and I lit a candle. I saw times square, and my it was overwhelming. I didn't spend much time there. I went to canal street because the bartender told me that's where you get all the high end knockoffs. I bought a pair of DG sunglasses, not because I wanted them but because I forgot mine. They were 7 doll hairs. I ate in a chinese place called "Excellent Dumplings". I didn't have dumplings but I had hot and sour soup and tofu noodles. I saw the Brooklyn bridge but didn't go across it. I also saw the skate spot underneath it. I knew it was there, but that wasn't why I went. It was interesting. There was lots of homemade stuff, and just as many BMX'ers as skaters. I walked through the projects trying to get to the bus. They weren't scary or anything, but they were so big it was overwhelming. I hear there are even more off the island. I also took the Staten Island ferry at night because i heard  the view was cool. I got to see the statue of liberty, and it wasn't as big as I thought it would be. It was still neat though. I went back and had some beers and talked to some girls from Columbia university. They were nice. Oh and I also checked out NYU. I wasn't impressed. The university was nice enough but the vibe didn't do it for me. The library was f'ing huge!!!! I went to bed early. Last night was my real NY experience. I hooked up with my friend who lives here and he took me to some bars on the lower east side. So many people and places it was amazing. We were going to go to this gypsy bar, which i wasn't that into, but we got there and it was dead. We passed a metal bar on the way and that was where we ended up. It was called the "murder city bar" and it was RAD. I probably just liked it because it reminded me of home. Oh, and as I was walking in I ran into a dude I see at the Hut all the time. What The Fuck! I sware. I was really tired from the two previous days, and though I had intended to take full advantage of the later bar hours (4am) I was pooped by 2:30. I wasn't really looking forward to the train ride back to the hostel so we took a cab to his house. It was a wierd feeling waking up after a night of drinking in an apartment in brooklyn!!! I did get to see what $900 dollars a month will get you. And that brings us to the present. Its  9:30 here and i leave in the morning so i must pack and get some sleep. I'm exhausted. Like I said my heart belongs to Portland....for now. pictures when i get back kids.

NYC

Just got here 6 hours ago and already at home!!! I missed 4 busses. First i waved at a driver and he drove off. I flipped him off. Then I only had a twenty. then i got my 2 dollars and found out that they only accepted quarters. finally caught the bus. got to my hostel, which is actually really nice. I was careful about my choice. it is a youth hostel intl property, so it is a good'n. I am sharing a room with 12 people, though. bought a pack of spirits for $7.50. then the night really got exciting. I had a slice of pizza for $3 that was the biggest thing I have ever seen in my life. Went directly to an irish pub, and was unpleasantly surprised to find it was a college bar. No one there was over 22. they were from Columbia university, but that didn't make it much better. I talked to the bouncer for an hour (a straight guinea, firefighter to boot). Then I left and went to a much less crowded bar where the nice bartender bought me a shot and took one for herself. Shortly after I arrived some weird dude that tried to talk to me at the other bar sat down and I talked to him for the rest of the night. Relatively speaking he wasn't weird, he was well dressed and worked in finance. He found out i was a mathematician and started grilling me. He tried to test me on the cosine of pi and started yelling at me and then found out he was wrong. I let him walk me home, cause frankly it was a bit sketch. Then he tried to kiss me. NO DICE dude! Now i'm in the hostel on the internet. Tomorrow I'm gonna cram as much as i can into the day, assuming i get up early enough. It's 4 am here. See yall soon!!!

Can't sleep

cause i'm too fucking excited. I'm going to new yawk bitches!!! and you ain't. I'm not leaving till thurs. tho

Countdown

t-minus 2 days. I am super fucking busy cause I have to get as much work as I can done before I go. Cause I ain't doing homework in NYC ya heard! i'm already scoping out places to troll for dirtbags, although I don't know how much damage I can do in 1 night. I have a friend there that I'm gonna hang out with, though, so maybe he can help me out. Seriously, when i move to NYC i may have to switch from dirtbags to B-boys. i've always had a special place in my heart for the b-boys ever since highschool when I used to run around with my best friends' older brother's graffiti friends. But, there really aren't any proper ones in PDX anymore. However, I suspect that there will be plenty there! Maybe i'll find a nice Pharell type hybrid of the two. Except he's a little heavy on the bboy side for me. Ah, so many men, so little time. Wish me luck!!!!